So, my plans for the rest of the year are to lose more weight, save money for Japan next year, look fabulous for Sasha in January, and…
To do some live storytelling, on stage, in front of an audience. Because if I say it out loud to everyone, that gives me less wiggle room to procrastinate and avoid as I would usually do.
I’ve mentioned it to a few of you individually, but still, writing it just now, all the shivers and pangs of nervousness. The other goals, just a matter of determination, stubbornness, rinse and repeat from similar efforts in the past, but this thing I actually have to learn to be good at. When I don’t know whether I am or not. All the workshops.
I had kittens when I had to do public speaking at school, and always thought I was rubbish at it. Maybe best not to reference school Paul, when the dinosaurs roamed. The first Bush presidency lol.
Solzhenitsyn and Virginia Woolf books. Six cocktails, two bottles of bubbles (the latter shared across the table). A menswear voucher that was too generous, but will very happily be spent.
Debt forgiveness from the parentals – there wasn’t much left on that particular bill, but every bit counts. A personalised voucher book, for things such as deep hug of at least thirty seconds, pizza and Netflix night, and an entire conversation with friend specifically not including her love life.
And enough offers of dinners, both home made and out and about, that I could extend the birthday celebrations from a week to a month, perhaps even an entire season lol.
But no, even though swag was gratefully received, my birthday was never really about that. It was the human connections I have with others, enjoying their company, appreciating their love, building a history.
While at the same time pretending to be blase and cynical about all that stuff that’s really important.
Insert rose coloured montage to Green Day’s Time Of Your Life here. 😆
Imposter syndrome, boss level.
With drinks tonight, there’s not a show to boost, there’s not a bar or restaurant to support (well, peripherally), the only thing to advertise is myself.
And I suck at self promotion.
Which is why I’ve been just “turn up if you want to” the last few years. Any more planning than that (and a venue, obviously) has done my head in.
And if I don’t get excited, I won’t be disappointed. I’ll be fine tonight I’m sure, but being the centre of attention, I have to get into the headspace.
After all, I’m a natural wallflower 😆
“Yeah, we worked at it for two days, but couldn’t quite get the last crease out.”
“Oh, that’s okay, you can hardly see it, and the shirt has been at the back of the wardrobe in Narnia for the last two years. Recycling the old clothes now that I can fit back into them.”
“Oh, well it’s lucky you kept them then.”
I looked at the dry cleaner quizzically. Who would throw out old clothes, especially ones that look this good?
“Well, I put a lot of effort into how I appear. You can tell when I’ve put the extra mile in.”
Left unsaid – equally, my godawful underwhelming looks are just as deliberate as the stellar stuff. 😆
Anatomy of my time in Perth, via birthday venues –
Year One – Oliver’s on James/The Court
Year Two – Devilles Pad
Year Three – Jamie’s Italian (lunch only)
Year Four – Cheeky Sparrow
Year Five – Frisk
Year Six – Mad Dogs
Year Seven – Tiki as FK
Next, an analysis of the attendee lists lol. No, not really, needless to say, they’ve changed a bit. Life reassessments and breakdowns tend to do that, surprisingly. 😆
Randomly stumbled across a WASO string quartet playing Clair de Lune. And now Vivaldi.
Singapore Airlines are doing a meet and greet for their new 787 business class cabin. I’m not rich or exclusive enough to hob nob with the champagne crowd within the roped area, but I sure as heck can loiter listening to live classical music.
Totes random, totes a midweek adventure hahaha.
I love my life sometimes.
I checked whether Cambridge Analytica had hacked into my account, but the answer was no. Feeling left out of the party, that none of my people did random dodgy survey online.
But then I console myself that both Facebook and Google have enough of my metadata, browsing and location history for Skynet, the Matrix, or Black Mirror to put together 99.9% of my personality, without even trying.
Good times 😆